tba, in process, email me if you want this completed and if you'll use it!

As with a woman, a man's insecurities rest largely around whether they will be attractive enough to the female and approved of in other ways by their partner.

And the second part is around how they compare with other males and how they measure up in the "male" activities, from being qualified and respected on the job to how they show up competitively with other men. 


As discussed elsewhere we evolved to maintain a "social status" that indicated we could be useful to the tribe (and thus survive longer) and that we could procreate (pass our genes on). 

Both of these are no longer necessary and we can survive just fine without being "high status" or the most attractive procreator.

Anything to the contrary is just cultural myth and false beliefs that are outdated.  Reality is that we can do just fine without both of them, as long as we realize and then act on creating what supports us adequately and that which fulfills us. 

We can be not good looking, but find a good relationship anyway, especially since women are attracted more to being safe and supported (and having a reliable, productive husband).   This "supported" not only means financial contribution but refers to character and lovingness.  All of those we are capable of creating for sure - and if we so choose to do what is necessary we will have a better relationship and a better life than a glamorous movie or singing star or model, by far!


One of the first comparisons for men are not just how high they are in the pecking order, but how high they are in the pecker order.  How do they measure up?  When compared to other guys in the locker room and how the woman perceives their package, especially the length of the penis. 

To many men, being "average" (identified as about 5" when erect, measured on the top of the penis) is something they might worry about, as they think that it is the man who is "hung like a horse" that all the women will use as the standard.  And they desperately need to be reassured by their female that she loves and is satisfied with his penis - which, for him, is a bit of an alter ego. 

Love me, love my penis.

Now this is not a minor, passing, occasional thing for men, but more of an ongoing preoccupation, bordering on obsession - where they will attempt to try the "increase your size" programs in order to please their woman more - but none of them work, so far.  So, men, you must do with the one you've got.  And, believe it or not, despite the rumors and hype, you're plenty ok.

There are two dimensions to this question.  Is it big enough to physically satisfy my partner or will she "not feel it".  Well, it is largely not realistic to "not feel it", especially if she does Kegel exercises (and is not "loose and sloppy").  Basically, the female vagina adjusts to the size of the penis, plus most of the nerve endings are in about 3", which is about the necessary size of the penis.   About 80%  (or more) of the women do not care about  the penis size and put more emphasis and meaning on the relationship and being close, snuggling, and some skillful manipulation of the sexual parts.   That skillful manipulation should be such that manually (or digitally, so to speak) stimulating the clitoris such that climaxes are virtually assured.  The man has to be willing to ask what she prefers and have her do a "that feels good" and "do it this way" awareness routine.  And he should follow the gigolo motto: "our clients always come first". 



If you think you have a "too small" penis (as the majority of men believe themselves to be less than average), you're probably wrong.  But if you have a relatively small penis and feel ashamed of it, it would be a sad day if you deprive your partner of sexual intimacy.  And you can adjust positions to accommodate it - you don't need to be able to sit back and let the 12" penis (hardly any are over 9") be able to reach it in no matter what position. 

Men put too much importance on penis size, with most women placing more importance on the overall picture, plus the "what they do with it that counts" proposition.  But, if you've been accepted by your woman for the relationship, you're "home free" and will always be considered ok at least.  So, get your overinflated ego importance out of the way.  There is always something that we fall short in and in doesn't matter if it is in penis length as long as it doesn't matter to your woman.  Just skillfully manipulate her clitoris and buddies to an orgasm and, then, do the penis in vagina thing (and it won't matter how long you last).

Just keep on cuddling and being warm and touching and be loving with her - that's what she wants, just as that is what you want, even if a woman doesn't have such large breasts (assuming you're "over" the obsession with goddess fantasies and Barbie dolls).  
It's your lovingness that counts, period!

Don't withdraw, don't obsess, don't withhold physical intimacy with her - no matter what!!!!!!



Most "studies" are based on estimates, many from men measuring themselves and self-reporting (a bit exaggerated) their sizes.  But official medical ones identify the average penis size in the U.S. is 5" erect, with 95% of men falling in between 4.23" and 7.53".  There are few outliers, though they are not so few liars.  


For most men, it is their knowledge that is too small.  I recommend you expand it considerably by becoming an expert in the subject - as any area in life where there are things that are repeated many times, it is "unsmart" to not master those sources of repeatable benefits.

Read at least 3 good books on the subject.  See the recommended books in

Love, Loving, And Being Loved Contents, Links

"Derivative" Behaviors

There are often pre-cursors to our more complex problems - and we need to learn about them before we can master what is further down the causal chain. 

Approval - A Possibly "Deadly" Game, Psychologically Speaking - A child's way of thinking, continued as an adult.

While women will tend to pick this up more naturally, men must be trained to learn it:

Emotional Intelligence

Books To Read

read at least the two books marked "A1" in priority:  Relationship Resources - Books.

Read at least two of the top rated books from the list in  Love Making - Honoring It And Have It Be Fully Fulfilling

Program For Men In Relationships

If you run across this page and want to have me design a program (using experts for detailed information), send me an email.

Meanwhile, there are paid programs and some less expensive resources listed in:
Relationship Resources.