THE AGING DECLINE
AND BEING SURE TO BE HAPPY ALONG THE WAY
Draft, in progress, will be developed in full. Contact me if you are interested in this...
STILL HAPPY? WHILE DECLINING?
"Happy? While declining? Are you nuts?"
Maybe, maybe not. Read this and see what actually makes sense and what actually works!
Happiness decreases from one's 20's to about 50, when one has adjusted to realities and begins to appreciate where one is in life. From 50 to 70 it rises substantially. Then, on average, a person starts to get less and less happy as his/her life becomes more about doctors and declining abilities.
Of course, we can "extend" our 'happiness rising" period by studying happiness and by learning to be wiser AND by taking care of our health. And we definitely want to do that, for sure, not maybe!
Inevitably, the reality of decline will happen - and what we need at that time is "perspective", where we rise above it all and look down to see that the reality is still astoundingly good.
"Yes, indeed, it does look like you are delusion, Mr. Garrick!"
Well, stay with me a little longer.
still ahead just a little less ahead...
Not so sexy, though in our minds we would still want to be sexy, not so attractive as our skin gets looser and looser and we look not so alive and vibrant - and we become "different" from the other people, the young ones, so they don't relate to us as well.
90 - People are thinking I must be miserable and they feel sorry for me as nothing seems to work anymore. But I can still enjoy the miracles of life, still enjoying a cup of coffee, movies, computers, music, reading. And, of course, I will have to spend alot of time taking care of myself and fixing things, as I hobble through life - but it will all be for a good payoff, so I can be happy about it as a worthwhile activity that permits me to enjoy the rest.
Why would my friend's father, who is also dear to me, still want to live after his son thinks his father is so miserable that he would want to take the arranged exit strategy? Perhaps because there is still something to hold on to, some experiences worth having.
To my dying day.
THE UNHAPPINESS IS FROM THIS, NOT THAT
Although, in our crazy thinking, we unnecessarily create unhappiness throughout our lives, if we see the flaw in "unhappiness thinking", we can be happy.
Although we have an abundance of great things in our lives, we set ourselves up to experience (often!) the "unhappiness gap", which is simply about being "short" of our unrealistic expectations - as if we are entitled to having them and in not having them we are experiencing a "loss".
Utter nonsense!
We are falsely creating a lower view of ourselves, thinking that we are less than we are, throught some very bad thinking and dysfunctional beliefs. So we start the gap at an unrealistic low line. And then we increase the gap from reality to "what we should have" by creating unrealistic expectations of such things as human capabilities and how famous or revered we should be or what we should have, etc. and etc. - all totally nonsense and out of touch with reality! (You should learn asap What Is Reality, including the Reality Of What We Have and the irreality of Unrealistic Expectations, which we think are realistic!!!!)
OUR REFERENCE POINT IN LIFE
At 20 or 30 or 50 or 70, we could say we had a wonderful life, with the positives vastly greater than the negatives - and we get accustomed to that reality - and then it becomes a "standard" from which to judge life (aka an unrealistic expectation).
A realistic reference point in life is "are there more positives in total effect than negatives?" Not "do I have less than what I had?" Of course, at some point the answer to that question is inevitably less in terms of physical and mental abilities.
But it is still good in terms of our still being ahead in life, compared to not having been born at all!!! Our standard above which we should have glee is not some ideal but simply "am I getting more good out of life than what it is costing me?" If so, it is still a "good deal", a good purchase for a worthwhile cost.
BUT I AM UNHAPPY ABOUT THE IDEA OF A "SUDDEN ENDING"
I am so very happy to have had this experience of living. It is so wonderful compared to not having been born and therefore not experiencing anything at all.
Why should it "continue"? Why should I expect that it should continue, when that is not reality at all?
But I will "end". "I don't want that."
Me neither. But I am ahead for having lived and up until my death it will all be a blessing, to treasure.
Then, poof, it is all gone (or we end up in "the after life" and are happy). So, it either continues or it doesn't - but I have lived a life and I loved it all (even the crappola along the way!)!!!!!!!!!
At no point (forever) are you behind, at less than a positive, for having lived. You never do worse than "breakeven". Maybe it ends up in nothing, but there was the reality of happiness for a long time before that end.
We are truly, truly, truly blessed for having been able to live this life!
And I am happy about it, always...
And then, what happens happens...
THANK YOU, WHOEVER OR WHATEVER, FOR THIS MIRACLE!
I am so very grateful, feeling chills down my spine, for being able to live this life. It is a gift beyond all I could have ever hoped for, compared to not being born at all!
Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you,
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I feel overwhelmed with happiness...
And when it comes time to say "good night" and to turn out the lights, I shall remember the beauty of life, until that very last moment in time, my final gift...
