THE GAP PRINCIPLE
A GAP IS JUST A GAP
If you don't have the result you want, it is not about a fault in you. It is simply because of a gap in the process to attain the desired result. You are not wrong. You simply need to fill the gap!
__________________________________________________________
Definition: a hole or space where something is missing
A variation on th old get rich concept (find a need and fill it): "Find a gap and fill it."
That is the "secret" to success.
IF YOU DON'T GET THE DESIRED RESULT, IT IS SIMPLY BECAUSE...
It is the never the "fault" of a person, just the lack of knowledge. It is the process/strategy, not the processor.
If the process does not work, it is simply because:
- There is an erroneous piece in the sequence, which needs to be removed (leaving a gap to be filled, as below)
- There is a gap to be filled to complete the process of obtaining the desired result.
The "gap" is typically the result of not sufficiently establishing the steps in the process such that the gap is left and/or a gap in one's knowledge (which needs to be filled by learning).
The gap will not be filled and the desired result will not occur by some miracle or wishful thinking or mysterious entity intervening. It is filled only by following the proceess that will cause the gap to be filled. (Read the alternative: And Then A Miracle Happened...Wanna Bet? .)
The person who has adopted the responsibility mindset simply has to notice that the result was not as desired and then look for the gap or faulty part in the process. Note that there is nothing on the planet that does not result from a process (a sequence of steps leading up to a result).
WHO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THAT GAP?
If there is a gap, who is responsible for that gap?
Rather obvious question and answer of course, as it is, in your life and in your affairs, always you. (You may have to do what is necessary to help another person close their gap if it causes a gap for you.) [To be happy and effective in life a person must understand and make the distinctions about Responsibility Vs. Victimhood (A Look At Being Powerful, Or Not).]
But the person is never wrong, to be blamed, nor is criticism valid - you must learn this concept as it is a base for all of life: The No-Fault, No-Blame, No Criticism Viewpoint - Essential For Happiness - read the sequences and go as deep as you need to to understand and install this into your life, as it'll be so worth the effort as it will affect your entire life greatly to the upside!
THE "GAP" AS A MISSING TO "WORRY" ABOUT
Apparently, something akin to a natural tendency to close the gap, by finishing whatever is left undone but on the mind, was better for survival - so it evolved into being a part of us.
David Allen, the time expert, suggests that we write all of our to do's down into a reminder system, so that the brain will not stay pre-occupied with it, trying to close the gap. If we assure "it" that we will get to it, usually at a particular time or by confidence that we will be able to do it in the future, then it will not "worry" (be pre-occupied with remembering it or trying to close the gap between undone and done) the brain - and in so doing, we free up the mind (its attention units and energy) for other things.
The more we tack things down so that our brain doesn't have to worry or constantly work it out, the more we will feel good in life. If we have too many things we are concerned about at once, we will, for sure, go into anxiety.
EXPLAIN TO ME MORE ABOUT THE GAP...
This includes every single piece and process in psychology
