THE GRAND ILLUSION OF "CREATIVITY", "GETTING APPROVAL"
VERSUS GETTING THE OUTCOMES YOU TRULY WANT IN LIFE
USELESS
Notes on a subject, if never referred to again, are just a bunch of ideas, with no outcome - and, as such, a huge waste of life. I have often gone to seminars and not followed up. And read great books, without implementing them because it "took so much time". A fool's waste of time. And I'd rather stop being a fool about this.
One of the hallmarks of a lower productivity person is that they are extremely busy but producing few outcomes of much value. (The extreme busyness is an undeniable sign, so don't say that you're an exception and just the victim of circumstances - as it is imperative that you realize what is true and workable and choose to be the cause of your circumstances and the steward of getting actual outcomes/results.)
NOTICING
So... as I went through the process of rethinking and noticing (a vital part of the process!) that which was not producing desirable outcomes, I noticed that I had idea diarrhea, that took up time but didn't really produce anything of solid substance, flowing through without being digested and used well.
So, I "looked" at what was happening, and then thought about what would close the gap between what the current practice was and what I wanted in this areas.
And I decided, at the very least, to always ask myself "will this result in anything worthwhile" and implicitly "will I ever really get back to it and use it?
If the answer is no, I grab my right hand with my left hand and restrain it from the automatic, thoughtless writing down of the idea - and I no longer create more gaps for myself to fill or pay attention to - those things are gone from the useless pile in my universe!
THE UNSEEN, FIXED MINDSET
Part of the grand illusion is particularly engaged in by those who are of a "fixed" mindset, always trying to prove themselves via their fixed ability levels. (Typically, they see themselves as trying to improve and change, but they seldom follow through - and their motivation for change is to be able to avoid disapproval, as they are always trying to get more approval - indeed, they are being driven by it.)
They engage in things that will get approval ("up-proof-al"), but with little discernment (as to what is useful).
They do not see that those who are responsible in life, rather than depending on others' approval, do that which will enables them to close the gap - to get the result - learning whatever is necessary and then actually doing that which will actually close the gap. (Notice that such people have almost no unclosed gaps. They address problems and fix them right away.)
They realize that "the gap" is "the space between where they are now and the desired outcome of something of actual value.
THE GREAT INSIGHT
They no longer see approval as having any more value than being the "cotton candy" of "outcomes" (outcomes of no value).
Instead, they actually gear their whole lives to producing actual "outcomes" of value.
They are no longer stuck in "form over substance", but are now living the mantra of "substance over form" - and outcomes are definitely the "substance" that makes life "substantial" and of value. (The "form" in this case might be "doing something in a particular way because it will make me 'look good'". Of course, looking good to others is just a way of getting more approval. But often it is just useless approval, a mere mental fabrication of no real value in life, not worth the effort or the anxiety.)
The irony of aiming to get "more approval" than is actually needed to have life work is that we think we are getting somewhere, whereas we are going nowhere, not achieving anything more of life value [which is, of course, our only valid target to make life better!].
THE ILLUSION OF "BEING RESPONSIBLE"
Another illusion we engage in is that we are being "responsible" if we are meeting our obligations and following the rules. If we are run by guilt or shame, we are being run by the "out there", giving the power to circumstances and the approval from others.
We must realize that the reality is that we are only being responsible in life when we are actually showing up in producing real outcomes of real value, rather than illusionary outcomes that we are the victim of.
Victims are dependent; responsible people are not dependent and produce outcomes that are of great value.
On the flip side of this, one is not being a responsible person in life unless it actually shows up in "proof" - and the only proof/evidence lies in the value of the outcomes produced!
THE GRAND MESSAGE HERE
So, the grand message here is about breaking the illusion (the fooling of oneself) of being busy and therefore productive!
No, we want to be productive, not busy!
Yes, we would work out what is most productive of life value, but we would also, no matter the time and effort involved, drop those activities/beliefs that are definitely unproductive and/or anti-productive.:
Our cardinal rule would always be "Only do that which produces desired outcomes and exclude that which doesn't."
STOP THIS - IMMEDIATELY!!!!
Stop writing down ideas that go nowhere (effective people always say "for every 1,000 men who have many great ideas, I only need one who can actually implement one.")
Stop trying to get approval where it has no value (where there is no payback to one for gaining the approval; where, even with an important person who can affect your life, there is no extra payoff for getting extra approval).
THE SOLUTION
One of the most productive things you can do in life is do what is necessary to get off the "approval" train - for it will take you nowhere or too far "off track" in life - and to be free at last to do that which truly benefits you, to be free from the unuseful angst of trying to get "enough" approval!
Follow all the steps in the program to get one to the point of not being uselessly manipulated by approval anymore. (This would be something to work with Keith in, in an immersion time where we work straight through that which is necessary to drop the approval-need illusion. True, it does take some thinking/learning and some time, for that is the reality of this world - but the payoff/outcome is so well worth it. For a perspective on approval, read this Approval - A Possibly "Deadly" Game, Psychologically Speaking. At least read the preface!)
If you truly want such a great outcome for having read this piece, you must schedule this in your calendar, to do a initial study time on it and then determine the next step (which would also then be scheduled into your digital calendar).
If you aren't willing to do that, then you'll stay in the same place, doomed to reading magazine articles and perhaps reading the occasional book (with no followup to completion) and staying in the wish thinking mode, continuing to be frustrated and unfree in life.
Your choice!
_____________________
Old famous sayings of wisdom:
"Never confuse activity with results."
"Never confuse volume (quantity of actions) for value (quality and substance)."
"You can never get enough from that which has no payoff or is of little value. Instead, you must go for what has the highest payoff, no matter what!"
"Rats are smarter than people, as they stop going down a tunnel with no cheese - while the human keeps on going down the tunnel hoping for cheese to suddenly appear, somehow, some way (maybe through "The Secret"?)."
