GETTING PAST A GOOD INTENTIONS DECLARATION
AND THE FIZZLE
Not finished yet, but some good ideas are in this...
"Most people declare good intentions and then nothing, or very little happens. How can we can past that and keep them going and keep them motivated and feeling sufficiently rewarded?"
IT'S ALL ABOUT THE SHORT TERM...UNFORTUNATELY
Change is not "natural", except when it is in response to a survival need of sufficient degree. Your body will change very quickly into high energy when confronted with a tiger or a foe. But if something is smaller and can be ignored because it has no compelling need to be fixed right now, our natural systems will tend to ignore it in deference to more immediate needs.
We did not evolve to primarily look out for the long term - as those who survived were very good at responding to, and fixing, short term threats and needs (a true need if unfulfilled is a threat to survival in some way).
FOLLOW THROUGH OR JUST "CRICKETS"?
So, this brings us back to the original question of how do we get ourselves to follow through on good intentions. Here's my experience with the opposite:
Declaration Of
Good Intentions → Crickets → No results
Or version 2, a brief spurt of activity, followed by going back to nothing.
If one declares that something will happen and then we hear the sound of crickets that means that there is nothing else going on!
So, I have the experience of people saying things like:
"I really want to reinvent my life." (But then they get too busy to do so, experiencing the same kinds of time sucks as before and the problems and suffering occur over and over.)
"I am miserable and so upset. I really want you to work with me so that I can be happier. I will do whatever it takes!" Some suggestions from me...and then "crickets".
SO, WHAT SHOULD I THEN DO?
It is my chosen responsibility to create actual results for people that will relieve suffering and/or increase their happiness. It is never appropriate to say "what's wrong with them? Why can't they follow through?" (The latter is not a question, but more of a make wrong, implying that they are "bad" for not following through.) But the truth is that there is "no fault" here, but simply a "not yet knowing" of what to do and how to do it and/or of how important it is in making a difference in their lives.
So, I need to figure out a way to no longer hear the crickets (other than going into denial or distraction). I need to figure out how to get from A (the declaration) to the desired results, including how to keep momentum and motivation up while "in the gap" (where we might not be getting the reward yet and where we are investing some of our psychological energy).
I have a problem. Therefore, I will use The Problem Solving Process (Duh! Of course!) If you want to see what I did, I recorded it on a separate page, so as not to burden this page but also so that I have plenty of space to insert my reasoning and the basis for it. If you go to that page, you will learn some life lessons and about "how things work" in life.
THE REASONS WHY IT IS NOT COMPLETED
(So, I brainstormed about this, listing all sorts of things that came to mind. Later, I culled some of them and this is what I was left with. These are, in a very real sense, the parts of a "complex whole" - and we know that a "complex whole" cannot be solved directly just as it is impossible to eat an elephant all at once. Each piece must instead be chewed and digested and then put together into a well-operating whole - that well-operating whole is called a system with its steps being part of a "procedure". A procedure is not some vague efficiency-expert concept but simply a way to proceed, where the steps are clearly laid out - in essence it is a "how to do".)
Logistics, steps (Ultimately we pull all of the factors into a "procedure" for succeeding at this.)
They have no path to follow - and it is difficult to create one, especially if one is busy and/or if one has no idea how to do that!
The path is unclear.
Provide them with a greater picture of how we would work together (or their path to learning and developing) so that they can see clearly the way to proceed, the gains along the way, and how they will feel arriving at the greater results in their lives. They want to know how would we work together or how would the program proceed, how often, how much time, etc.
Psychological factors
Unclear on present value of benefits
Conflicting factors
The belief that there is not enough time (and a very vague concept of the time it will take). They do not know how to free up their time - nor that there is actually plenty of time if they follow the "Life Productivity" principles.
Perhaps there is a more urgent feeling need that needs to be handled first.
Perhaps they are confused, have not really defined what they want (nor the reward of getting it) or are caught up in "not knowing", which can throw them into an emotional quandary. To understand this, read Deconfusing Confusion - Its Effect And Its Solution. This also relates to a prime ingredient in being grounded and "safe" in life.
Psych tank is too low
They run out of "psychological gas" to power their vehicle along the path towards the desired results. [People need a tank to draw from, and that tank must be filled in the first place. We often run on close to empty tanks (of physical energy or of psychological energy).]
Have someone clearly see where they are relative to where they want to be, so they are motivated (i.e. energy is generated).
Fear of criticism, threat, anxiety. failure
A motivator based on a falsehood
A lack of understanding
Make it easier, remove the barriers, such as having to think of what to do next, have sequential forms in a workbook, so there is a sense of making progress and a defined path to keep them on. Never having it go without sequences for each step, even after we've finished one set of sequences to have a next step on what to go to...
